The Ultimate!

So I'm writing to you today deep in thought. Its been plaguing my mind as of late. You know that all time question, "What are we here for?" Now some of you may never think of this question, but, I think of this question almost daily. Weird I know, however you know how some people are like I know what I want to do with my life and they are only like 3yrs old. 1yr ago I would have bet my life on the fact that I was put on this earth to be a wife and a mother! Well if you know me at all you know I have neither. NOW that does not mean I don't WANT either of those. Cuz as we all know I WANT to be a wife. But maybe my thinking that I should be a wife is just that my thinking. Maybe its not what God has in store for me. Or for that matter to be a mom. But I ask you why then does it weigh so much on my heart and mind. Why can't I go to bed at night and SLEEP knowing that it really is all in his plan. It Iritates me. AND for that matter if its NOT supposed to happen for me couldn't he just make that known to so I can get over it an move on? Now this is not a simple poor Kerry pity post. Its just something I was thinking on as of late. I was talking to a friend at work and she used to be a liscensed foster parent and was telling me the ins and outs of it. It sounds hard, emotional, hard, fun, hard, and maybe even a little rewarding. Now call me sentimental but all these thoughts came to my while watching the BLIND SIDE. Have you seen it? Well its good. BUT my point is this. I WANT THAT! I WANT my life to mean something to someone someday. Is that too much to ask. I feel like its just me in this little apartment, all I do is work, sleep, eat, and more work. Is that enough. Will it ever be enough to take that void away that screams at me that I want a family of my own? I don't know I guess I just want to know that Someone someday will show up to my funeral and that my absence in this world will be greatly missed. (beside by my nephews) :):)

Size 0 by my Birthday!!! Part THREE!!!

Well I did it I finally hit that 20lb mark. I feel like I've had quite the accomplishment and I'm soooooo not ready to give up. I've even gotten to were even though I'm tired I still want my work out. I go a minimum of 2x's a week to weigh in and actually look forward to it. So its going great. At work we have our own little Biggest Loser going on and I am the winner for the week. The person who wins gets $300, but the ends not till April sometime! :) I'm well on my way though. So enough of that. I had a very profound thought this week and thought i would ask it of all my readers. Why, I ask you, do we never want something until, of course, we can't have it??? Now I'm sure we all have asked this question at some point in our life. However the past few weeks it really has come to the front for me! Other than that not much else. Preston has to have surgery on his eye, I'm still single, I'm well on my way to size 0, Got my car back and fixed, and yes still working 3 jobs! :)

Size 0 by my Birthday Part DUEX!!!!

OK so heres the scoop. Here you will see 8lbs of

butter! Add about 2.5lbs more and you will have

the equivalent of the amount of weight I have

lost so far on my diet. 11.5lbs in 2 weeks and 1 day. Now I'm not good at this diet thing but I think thats pretty good! So just thought I would update. I'm gonna start excersiceing soon. So I should drop more. I htink Uncle Sam is going to give me enough back I can buy a wii and wii fit!! woohoo Biggest loser here I come!!!!!

JENNY"S PREGO!!!!!!

Woot Woot Spidermonkey!!!! Jenny's pregnat!!! Now to most of you this means little. HOWEVER to me it means. NEW PLAY TOY!!!! I have had jenny go buy drano for this weekends test, I made her pick up a key, I'm going to hold a needle over her tummy, and a few other things I found online! This is gonna be fun. :) Seriously though shes pregnant and I could not be more thrilled. While I love Taylor(her oldest daughter) I can not wait to see Jenny with a baby. How funny will that be. :) Anyways thats all for now. I'll keep ya posted on the results of our test and mayb post some pics! :)

Size 0 by my Birthday!!!!

OK so its really out in the open now so i guess I'll come clean. yes I have joined a diet program. Its the medical weight loss clinic here in Grand rapids. I'm still very iffy on it but doing my damdest to make it work. The picture below is just 1 meal for me. I eat about 6 times a day all yummy grocery store food. So we shall see. I have since I really started (3 days ago) droped 5lbs. So if you see the montra size 0 by my birthday just go with it! I know I could never be a size 0 its just the thought!. So thats it for now. I'll post later when I have more to report! :)

Update

Not to much to update on. But the few things there are are as follows:
New Years party was a Hit (as usual) THANKS to all who came!!
I am officially moved in to the new Apartment and LOVING IT!!!!!
Russell asked me on the phone the other day "KerryBear why do you have to live so far away for your job?" And I wanted to cry on the spot. I think I'm moving back home for him now!!! :):)
I'm heading home this weekend to snowmobile and its way past due cuz I'm dying to go for a ride!!!
I am working almost full time right now as I have a coworker going out for about 6 weeks. :) Yea for my paycheck !:)
Yes I'm still working the other two jobs while working almost full time at that job
It snows ALOT in Greenville
Coupon shopping kicks ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and save you a ton of money too)
and last but I'm sure not least
I got my black boots for Christmas from santa and am IN LOVE with them!!! Thanks Santa!
thats it. Told you its kinda a boring life

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well its almost here. I got mom's present ordered last night and I'll be picking Ryans up when i get home wed evening. Other than that I'm done and ready for the Christmas season. Hope everyone has a GREAT one and don't forget MY new years eve party here at my new place. Just let me know if your coming so i can have a rough head count!! :):) Other than that i have posted my Christmas cards below these are what I sent out to everyone this year just thought you all would get a kick out of it too (even though its my pic on FB) Anyways MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!

Love Santa's Naughty Elf!